So today my darling readers, I would like to talk to you about something my best friend and I have been talking about for the past week. True love.
A subject that will constantly plague your mind, whether you are alone and waiting for it to arrive or if you are with someone and hoping that they are it. So here is a question. How do you know when you have it?
When you first meet someone, don't the old wives tell you that you will know if they are the one or not? Well what about those that fall in love over a long period of time, like high school lovers? Does that mean that they don't have true love, or does that mean that it comes after years have passed? So many things that run through our minds when we are doubting, so many little issues we drag out of the jar we have been storing them in as soon as we start to question it.
It's hard when you meet someone, who falls irrevocably in love with you within minutes, and you are left wondering. Should I give this a try? I mean you think they are lovely, and they make you smile but does that mean you don't love them? No butterflies, and doubts within days? Well speaking from a massive commitmaphobe, a slightest doubt can make you run for the hills. So today I would like to tell you all a story, one that is true and one you may have heard before, but here goes.
I fell in love with a boy the first day I met him. He made me smile, and laugh and as a loud girl, I turned shy. I wanted to impress him yet somehow I knew he didn't need it, I wanted to make him happy yet I knew he was already. After meeting him, I saw him everyday afterwards, and the time I spent away from him was painful. I always thought that it was in fairy tales that this happened, that the princess gets sweeped off her feet by the prince the second he kisses her lips. Well, I was right...
True love though it felt, it ended. Crashing my world around me, stopping my world from spinning and my heart from beating. I felt like life was over, but with help from those around me I got through it; and though I have not spoken to him since that day I often sit and think of him, about what he is doing and whether he ever thinks of those moments we spent together.
Since the last day of our relationship love hasn't hit me once, not once. Some small part of me doubts I will ever fall in love quite as strongly again, as no one compared. Though the thing is. I have met so many people, and amazing friends that my heart slowly fixed itself with my friends love, not his. Gradually the pain left me, but the fear of being hurt hasn't. So now that every time an amazing guy gets close to me I run for the hills, I start to doubt if we could work, whether we'll grow to hate each other and more.
It would seem that this horrible habit of mine has brushed off onto my best friend, who recently dipped her toe in the dating scene, and as soon as she caught a bite, she ran. Crying in my arms she told me of her doubts, her fears, all of the things that this boy wasn't in comparison to the guy she has dreamt of all of these years. She called herself silly, that she shouldn't be so picky, that she shouldn't hope for her prince charming. I mean, look at what happened to me!
I genuinely cracked that night, my mind wandered off and made me think. Why shouldn't we all wait out for that guy? That one that has no doubts, the one that is so perfect for us we want to cry? That we don't doubt it for a second, that we are confident enough to be ourselves completely and trust that they will catch you when we fall? I want my prince charming, don't you?
My prince charming, turned out to be the wrong path, but hey! There are thousands! With each decision you make, a new path is created. A new prince charming is introduced to your world and one more chance to fall in love, so why not take it? If you don't like them then don't date them but if you think they could be the one? Why not jump in? Why not let yourself fall in love?
Living in fear will get you one place. No where. Sometimes it is better to live without fear than with it. So this is my advice to you my gorgeous best friend, and to all of you out there. Let yourself find your prince charming, he is out there. Just never doubt yourself when you take an ulterior path because at the end of the day, if he is your prince charming he will storm through the wilderness to find the path you took and take you to a golden one.
So grab toto, and your bright red heels and find that yellow brick road without fear, because he is waiting there, and he has all the time in the world.
Happy Readings
Chann
