So, my beautiful readers, this one is for all of the best friends out there! I'm sure you have heard this many times before, but ex's are off limits to friends, unless the circumstances are unique and you have the honest permission of the friend. I mean come on, it's like the rules of feminism!
Well, the reason I am ranting about this today, is because a friend came to me devastated today. She told me that her most recent ex, who shattered her heart into pieces, and then proceeded to stamp on them, was going on a date with her best friend. Her friend had assured her that she would never go near him like that, but she had asked if she was allowed to hang out with him at least? Of course my friend had said no, as it would hurt her too much but her best friend had been overly insistant. The next day, she had recieved a phone call from a close friend informing her that her ex had been bragging about the fact that he was going on a date with her friend.
Right! Let me get this straight! Hanging out with an ex of your friend (depending on the fact of if he has hurt her) is a massive no no! You just do not go there! It will hurt your friend severly, she will be sat thinking about whether you are going to come back hating her, whether you will have listened to the rubbish that spouts from his mouth, or even worse! So to go on a date? ha! Do you want to lose your friend? No? Then cancel the god damn thing and apologise!
Not only has your friend suffered through an attrocious break up recently, but now she has to deal with her best friend not taking her side! It'll be one more dagger, slicing through her heart, cutting off her windpipe, and leaving her feeling more alone than ever.
Though your friend may be moving on, going on a few dates, and having the courage to go out on the town again, it is still never the right time to drop that bomb shell on her. Also, put yourself in her shoes. Maybe an ex that will always have a place in your heart, someone, who you expressed to your friend, you didn't want seeing your friend, due to him talking slander to your mates in the area straight after the break up. You wouldn't want to be there would you? Then stop what you are doing! It's wrong and you know it!
Don't get me wrong, I understand that you may have been friends with him, while your friend was dating him, but that doesn't mean you guys will ever be as close as you and your best friend. If he hurt her, doesn't that mean he is capable of hurting you? Remember that!
And guys? If you are on the recieving end of your ex's best friend's attention? Reject it! It may seem like a great idea, or that they are you friend, but no matter what happened, they are going to need a best friend to go to. Someone who IS biased towards them, and will take their side. If not? They will be on their own, and upset. Be the bigger person, and give them that.
Oh! If it is your best friend that's doing it to you? Well. They clearly weren't a best friend at all.
Happy readings!
Chann
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